Monday, February 21, 2005

George Birthington's Wash Day

Vanessa here...

Can you believe I have to work today? On a National holiday? Doesn't my employer understand there are very important President's Day sales in progress at malls across America? One day only sales, in fact, that woo shoppers into the crowded malls to spend money they don't have on items they don't need. Although, I admit, I have my eye on some adorable floral print shirts and skirts from Banana Republic's spring line. And there are some shoes at Aldo I want to check out. I'm thinking of abandoning my traditional black this spring for some sunnier, brighter colors like teal, yellow or pink. My toes are suffocating in three pairs of socks and boots...just waiting for the time when I'll wear sandals again.

But nooooo...I have to be sitting here at work, in a snow storm, no less!

I'm convinced that we won't see the sun here in Boston until well into May. I already have fake 'n bake tanning lined up so I won't look like the pasty white New Englander that I am.

As fate would have it, I saw Ponytail Cutie this morning on the train, so he had to work, too. Aren't we the epitome of a hard working couple? we're not a couple, yet...but I vow to meet this guy and wow him with my Virtue charm. Upon the advice of my friend Griz, I actually followed PC this morning down his street and so now I know what building he works in. There's a deli in there, too, so Griz and I are going to tromp over there in the snow (what a pal!) in a little while for lunch to see if we can run into him. I'm trying to think up a clever way of meeting him officially. Griz says I should spill tuna salad on him, but I think that's just rude. Maybe I'll try the old fashioned way like, "Hi, I'm Vanessa...and you are?"

I have these tickets that my roommate, Mia, gave me to this show. It's called The Puppetry of the Penis. She said I should ask someone to go with me on a date. Right! Not exactly the ideal place for a date...I mean, what would the guy think of me going to something like that? I hear the show is hilarious...but not what I had in mind to ask a strange guy out. For PC, I'm thinking something more intimate, like dinner and drinks at Oskars over on South Street or the Wonder Bra (Bar) over in Allston -- although it's usually packed with rats, errr...I mean, students. I have to think this through.

For now, though, I'm distracted by this creepy guy here in the office that keeps insisting on opening the window because he says there are fumes emenating from the office machines. He says the fumes from the Xerox machine are toxic and he has to let fresh air in or else he'll choke. Let's not mention that it's in the 20's outside and in addition to all the fresh air he's letting in, there's also snow pouring in on the vacant cube where the window is. I've closed the window three times already and the jackass keeps opening it. This man is a serious freak. But, he's the best cold-calling salesman we've everyone (except me) forgives him his eccentricities. He's this little troll of a man who wears rainbow suspenders and has Coke-bottle thick glasses, but he's got a great phone voice and schmoozes clients like I've never heard before. He's mental though. I mean, anyone who thinks the copier is out to get them is just weird.

So, I'll sit here until it's time to venture over to the deli to see if I can bump into PC. Wish me luck! The lives of our future children depend on our meeting. :)

Until then...go enjoy those President Day sales and leave something for me to go buy after work!

Double Vee


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