Thursday, June 02, 2005

I've been Googled!

Vanessa here...

I have to say, the Internet is a wild and wacky place! You never know who's reading your site or who's looking for information on you. Google is a creepy, scary, cool thing in that it can find anything, anywhere on any topic. And I must say, from my blog statistics, there are some frightening Google searches going on out there that yield "The Adventures of Vanessa Virtue."

For the record anyone wondering...I am not Vanessa Nimmo (shown below) from the UK version of "Big Brother."



This is not me. Sure, that Vanessa and I have a few things in common...we're both single, 27, but she's British and I'm...me. According to her TV show bio, she "has a pierced nipple and can twist the men round her little finger." That's not exactly a past-time I've mastered, although, dammit, I'm trying. Oh yeah...she's a model and a South African archery champion. So, folks who are Googling "Vanessa Big Brother" and getting my rant about the government...well, sorry.



There's also a great deal of pervs out there Googling the word "tinkle" or more specifically, a great deal of pervs in China are Googling "sprinkle when you tinkle" and it's pulling up golden shower websites (ewwww...) and my rant on the ladies room. Folks, there's nothing pornographic about my blog except the random potty (no pun intended) mouth I expel.



Today's funny was someone Googling "sex wearing tevas" and yes, this too, brought up my blog. This was in reference to a guy I saw with some nasty toe jam who was wearing Tevas. But this Google search brought up some a website that read (censored): "I like this guy so much, that I'd let him %$#@ me in the butt while he was wearing Tevas." Now that's just not right! This is a family website people! *giggle*

(Sorry...no picture for this reference!) And finally, someone was apparently interested in my cup size and Googled "Vanessa big boobs" and along with my site here, there's also this lovely advertisement for some chesty blonde named Vanessa Blue the Big Boobed Lady. Lovely. And hell no, I won't give you think link, go Google it for yourself.

So, it just goes to show you that every word in your blog is Googlable (I love making up new words) and it challenges me to stick some doozies in every now and then just to see what will show up in people's searches.

Besides...it distracts me from doing actual work, which I must return to now. Those marketing leads won't generate themselves!

Hang loose,

Double Vee

2 Comments:

Anonymous j said...

Couldn't resist checking out Vanessa Blue the Big Boobed Lady. Thanks for the site. ;-)

9:07 AM  
Blogger Liz Maverick said...

*Snicker* That's kinda funny. I'm also struggling with bizarre Google traffic. I seem to be associated with something called an "Ass Contest." So when people google "ass contest," perhaps in the sense of I'd like to pick the best ass, or I'd like to enter my ass in a contest, they get my site. I think it's because I once ran a contest for The Shadow Runners which I referred to as a "kick-ass contest." Sigh.

2:48 PM  

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